Public Scored Example

Renewable Energy IELTS Essay Sample with Band 6.5 Evaluation

Read a renewable energy IELTS essay sample with a Band 6.5 evaluation, criterion breakdown, and next-step improvements.

IELTS question

Some people believe that governments should invest more in renewable energy sources rather than fossil fuels. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Sample essay

Nowadays, energy is very important for our life. Some people think governments should spend more money on renewable energy like solar and wind power instead of oil and coal. I agree with this opinion because renewable energy is better for the environment and can help the economy. First of all, renewable energy is good for the environment. Fossil fuels like oil and coal create pollution and cause global warming. If we use more solar and wind power, we can reduce carbon emissions and protect the planet. Many scientists say climate change is a big problem, so we need to act now. Secondly, investing in renewable energy can create many jobs. The renewable energy industry is growing fast and needs many workers. This can help reduce unemployment and boost the economy. In conclusion, I strongly believe governments should invest more in renewable energy. It is better for the environment and can create economic benefits.

Band breakdown

Overall

6.5

Task Response

6.5

Coherence

6.5

Lexical

6.0

Grammar

6.5

Evaluation summary

This essay answers the question clearly and stays on topic.
The position is consistent, but development is still fairly general.

What works well

Clear agreement position from the introduction.
Logical paragraphing with one main idea per paragraph.
Relevant environmental and economic arguments.

What still limits the score

Examples and explanation remain broad rather than specific.
Vocabulary is repetitive and mostly high-frequency.
Sentence structures are controlled but not very varied.

How to improve this essay next

Add one specific country or policy example.
Replace repeated general words with more precise topic vocabulary.
Use one or two more complex sentence patterns in each body paragraph.

Use this sample properly

Compare your own essay against the question, the band breakdown, and the weaknesses listed here. The goal is not to copy the writing. It is to see which scoring behaviors you need to improve in your own draft.

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